Chapter 29 - ROSIE CHOSE TO VISIT HER FATHER AND ELIAS WAS NOT INVITEDRosie was nine.
Two years had passed since first letter.
Therapy.
Questions.
Court review.
Dante remained incarcerated.
No disciplinary violations in eighteen months.
Contact permitted if Adeline agreed.
Rosie asked.
“I want to see him once.”
Adeline did not sleep that night.
She wanted Elias there.
For herself.
Not Rosie.
That was difference.
When she asked Rosie who she wanted present, answer came immediately.
“You.”
“Dr. Lane?”
“Yes.”
“Uncle Eli?”
Rosie thought.
“No.”
Elias accepted.
That surprised Adeline.
“You’re not hurt?”
“Yes.”
She stared.
He corrected:
“I’m allowed to feel hurt.”
“She’s allowed to decide.”
There it was.
Growth not absence of feeling.
Choice despite feeling.
Visit lasted forty-three minutes.
Dante entered room looking older than photographs.
Rosie stared.
He stared back.
Neither moved.
Finally Dante said:
“Hi.”
Rosie:
“Hi.”
No hug.
No tears running into arms.
No music.
A table.
Three chairs.
A guard.
Dr. Lane nearby.
Adeline beside Rosie.
Dante asked:
“You like science?”
Rosie looked suspicious.
“Who told you?”
“Your letters.”
“Oh.”
They discussed school.
Tomatoes.
Books.
Then Rosie asked:
“Why did you lie so much?”
Adeline stopped breathing.
Dante looked at his hands.
“Because lies let me keep things I would have lost if I told truth.”
“Like what?”
“My marriage.”
“Money.”
“People liking me.”
“Control.”
Rosie frowned.
“You lost them anyway.”
“Yes.”
“Then that was dumb.”
Dante almost laughed.
“Yes.”
Then Rosie asked question no adult expected.
“Did you like Aunt Caroline?”
Dante’s face changed.
“Yes.”
“Did you love her?”
“I thought I did.”
“What does that mean?”
He swallowed.
“I liked how she made me feel.”
“I’m not sure I cared enough about how I made her feel.”
Rosie looked at mother.
Adeline’s eyes filled.
Dante continued.
“That isn’t same as love.”
Rosie nodded slowly.
Then:
“Do you love me?”
Silence.
Dante answered carefully.
“I feel love for you.”
“But I don’t know you well enough to claim I know what loving you should require.”
Adeline looked up sharply.
That was best answer he could have given.
Rosie thought.
“Okay.”
At end Dante did not ask for hug.
Good.
Rosie stood.
“I don’t know if I want to come again.”
Dante’s jaw tightened.
Pain.
Then he nodded.
“Okay.”
Outside, Rosie was quiet for entire drive.
At home Elias waited in greenhouse but did not approach.
Rosie walked to him.
“How was it?”
He asked.
“Sad.”
He nodded.
“Bad?”
“No.”
“Good?”
“No.”
“Just sad?”
“Yes.”
Then Rosie hugged him.
Elias held her.
She whispered:
“He looks like you a little.”
“That is unfortunate.”
She laughed against his jacket.
Then looked up.
“Are you mad I didn’t take you?”
“No.”
“Were you sad?”
“Yes.”
Rosie smiled slightly.
“Mom says both can be true.”
“Your mother is irritatingly correct.”
Across greenhouse Adeline heard.
“Excuse me?”
Rosie laughed.
Life resumed.
No reconciliation.
No rejection.
Just one visit.
May you like
One choice.
Exactly enough.
